tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22161997095611723802024-03-14T14:58:46.416+07:00Nisa KaruniaNisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comBlogger494125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-48356832037840622912015-10-18T21:38:00.003+07:002015-10-18T21:46:50.849+07:0014 things about Adil<div style="text-align: justify;">
Time flewww so fast! It has been 14 months since me and Adil being together. Such a lovely time I've had... hope he feels the same tho :)<br />
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The things is, I've been crushing on him until now, unbelievably, in every simple yet precious thing he does. Nobody perfect they do say, but for me..... Adil is. Tomorrow is another common day yet by writing down here reminiscing who Adil is and what just he did in my life, would it be captured nice? So here we go, dil!</div>
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<b>1. Fam First Boy</b></div>
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Adil was born as the first kid on his fam. He has one younger sister, a cool mommy, and a classy daddy. He has spent his life in Chicago back then when he was a little boy due of his dad study abroad. He ever told me that when he was back to Jakarta, he had some hardship in order to adapt with his local friends. They act against him sometimes but who cares, he has a great family by the way. Adil's family used to hangout every weekend, once or twice a month with the big one. I always love to be with them... because of foremost reason, this guy just showed me how does it feel to have an intact, a happy family.</div>
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<b>2. A Part Time Loner</b></div>
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Adil tends to be alone rather than mingles in crowd. At any point somehow I see him having spaces between himself to the others. He might laugh hard at your jokes but deep inside he just wants to go home. He has only few friends but that's enough, he knows he'll always have me! :p</div>
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<b>3. Datsun Geek</b></div>
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Adil loves this car........ more than he loves me I guess! Hahaha but that's okay I love it too. He loves it most when it screams out loud but sometimes it really really freaks me out. He is a brutal driver, fyi. </div>
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<b>4. Bravo Bassist</b></div>
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I think his bass was his first girlfriend ever. He is good at playing it. Psssttt, I fell in love with him just by seeing his pict holding his bass somewhere on the web lolololol. I remember the first time I saw him playing bass was on Portico, I forgot the exact time tho. I can't stand not to bring him flowers. Now, he may give up on his dream to be a success musician due to some reasons but hey I'm the one who's gonna tell him that I was a proud girlfriend and will always ever be :D</div>
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<b>5. Bingo! Music Taste</b></div>
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It's just amazing that in over 7 billion people who live in this world, Adil has the same music taste with me. This cool boy, which is my boyfriend, influenced by electro alternative pop and that similar rhyme; a music taste that I've rarely met in someone. When everyone didn't get why I listened to those kind of musics back then, Adil shut them up.</div>
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<b>6. Sports Hater (?)</b></div>
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He hates doing sport (sighhhhh). He is as lazy as fckk hahahahaha neither do I. The only sports that can almost catch his attention was swimming. But we never swam together. It was rather a playing water together :(</div>
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<b>7. He Drinks Sweet, But Not That Sweet Anymore</b></div>
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Just laugh above but sadly it's true hahahahaha. When I and Adil going to cafe or restaurant or anywhere we eat at, he always orders sweet drinks. From mocktail to sweet tea, from sodas to fruit punch. He used to be a really sweet guy, also. But now he grows up to be a half of me hahaha I always miss the sweetie cutie pie version of you but I miss you everytime tho :)</div>
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<b>8. Favorite Food?</b></div>
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I don't know exactly his favorite food HAHAHAHA he loves everything that can be eaten apparently!</div>
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<b>9. He Loves Beach Then He Turns Red</b></div>
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Adil has a very sensitive skin. He loves beach to be a travel destination but when we go home, his skin just turned to be red for days ahead. And I know it hurts for him :( but not that hurts as we have gone the long wrong way to reach Ujung Genteng virgin beach hahahahahaha the craziest yet the most fun road trip I have ever done with someone. No, not just someone, it's Adil I have been with :)</div>
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<b>10. Morning Person</b></div>
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He always woke up in the morning earlier than me! Hahahahahahha sorry not sorry :p</div>
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<b>11. Revenge? Why Not</b></div>
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Hahahahahah really, he's such a spiteful. Over times when I fought with him, he always knows the spot he should hit to make me feel guilty :( no more fighting, promise?</div>
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<b>12. Pampy Boy</b></div>
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He is! He loves to be kissed in the forehead and to be pampered anywhere all over his body when he's sick. I couldn't stand to leave him alone when he's sick... I don't know why but when I looked at his eye I just feel I have to embrace this little boy and protect him from any evil power out there :(</div>
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<b>13. Overthinker</b></div>
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He does, he really does. Hey baby don't be afraid... If the future is scary that means you have worked on something to make it worth it :)</div>
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<b>14. He is the one for me (or at least I believe so).</b></div>
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Happy 14th, Adil Mochtar! :)</div>
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Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-26035186374128051732015-09-08T23:43:00.001+07:002015-09-08T23:51:33.730+07:00One Tuesday in September, 2015<div style="text-align: justify;">
Hi there, just try to make a quick update.<br />
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It's been so long since the last time I wrote here; told you everything in my life that has been up to. Well, it turns out... amazing :) I kind of confuse untuk mulai dari mana, what if... oh okay, my after-campus life sounds fit in.</div>
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After graduated on September 2014, sebenarnya gue gak punya target tertentu yang harus segera dipenuhi. My bad indeed, karena akhirnya sempat bingung mau ngapain dalam waktu dekat, waktu itu. Apakah mau langsung kerja atau kuliah lagi, dua-duanya sama-sama menarik and you know, challenging so I tried them all hahaha. But the good news is, life turns out unpredictably fun when you just decide what you should decide, I mean it was like... not to chase the opportunity that you're about to have but to make what you already have as the opportunity itself. And that happened to me when I was accepted at one of national growing television, as their journalist. Bener-bener gak pernah kebayang sebelumnya how adventurous yet fun a life of a journalist could be. It's like you have that press-id you'll get all access everywhere lol. I enjoyed it for a moment, oh no, for 9 months to be precise. And that was, really really, the most precious career experience in my life until now.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-zjlIswOzdkiG6UnezUR8np4-qz-BnUKtFC-uQD3eLhktFJr3KEhihr0-7d6f0rlXDaxHrxg6G-T5WbKWwIpkkai4fiffbcxcxjA_K7DHP2NJPDvXXYLGSrQ9Dpu4UXRrF7SfaHqJpqjq/s1600/image3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-zjlIswOzdkiG6UnezUR8np4-qz-BnUKtFC-uQD3eLhktFJr3KEhihr0-7d6f0rlXDaxHrxg6G-T5WbKWwIpkkai4fiffbcxcxjA_K7DHP2NJPDvXXYLGSrQ9Dpu4UXRrF7SfaHqJpqjq/s320/image3.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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The perks of being a journalist, was never as easy as everybody thought would be. I mean when it comes to your shift you just have to do that even ketika semua orang berkumpul sama keluarganya saat malam takbiran, or when your long distance relationship sister by blood having her birthday but you can't pick her up as her flight landed home. Yes, my sister got her sophomore this year that I hate to admit too I got way much older than her.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirTrLVtBDCQNos9oHA4g794gRq7G8pIaOHtOqYxdgMEEFB2faSrEXEy5YRGEZHAjJw_6VvYUApjmJvdr2oniSoLs0CVEwqkbwRmDd2S0y3f6EFNyrm-bzBN0KMhdVvVDJOr90RP3_wfzOZ/s1600/image4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirTrLVtBDCQNos9oHA4g794gRq7G8pIaOHtOqYxdgMEEFB2faSrEXEy5YRGEZHAjJw_6VvYUApjmJvdr2oniSoLs0CVEwqkbwRmDd2S0y3f6EFNyrm-bzBN0KMhdVvVDJOr90RP3_wfzOZ/s320/image4.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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Sooo let's back to my journalist life, after a long time of thinking and listening here and there and everywhere; I decided to submit a resignation letter. Sekali lagi, being a journalist is not easy. Doesn't mean gue cengeng atau gimana but I just can't see myself toward within that tunnel. The schedule, as the foremost reason I quit, just didn't fit in with another stuffs I planned for the future (well I learned from what I didn't do backward: making plan). And it can't go alone. But you didn't choose life, life chooses you.</div>
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After that, alhamdulillah I got another job in specifically not a long time; two weeks. This new job offers regular office hour for which I hopelessly seek in the previous one. And alhamdulillah also, I decide to complete His rule as a woman, to be more grateful for the never ending blessing He pours my life with. If anybody asks why I don't know what can answer best. All I know was I only have now so as long as that time still belongs to me I should do what The Creator told me to. And I'm happy, proud, and feel peace :)</div>
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And all these great decisions were come up from this man too. The one for at least I believe to be a partner in raising my children with :) hehe. One year feels like a blink of an eye spent with him. Sekarang lagi nabung nih sama Adil buat......... hehehe doain aja ya :) alhamdulillah can't be more grateful enough.</div>
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ps: keep me updated! love, your online diary :p </div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-20514239650474362902015-02-10T22:08:00.002+07:002015-09-08T21:56:21.003+07:00in the darkest hour of mine<br />
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in the heavy rain of desperate and fall</div>
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in the hidden cave only myself know</div>
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I got my sunshine.</div>
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He's not a part of my life. He is my life.</div>
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Love is not a fairytale. It does exist, darling. You don't have to rush, don't have to run and hide; you gotta let it flow. Overwhelmed your veins. Beyond your mind and brain. And suddenly life starts to make sense again. </div>
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I love you, Adil Mochtar.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-4109485648762458852014-09-24T00:00:00.003+07:002014-09-24T00:02:28.862+07:00Officially Graduated<div style="text-align: center;">
It was on Friday, 29 of August 2014. It was all because of and for them.<br />
And whatever lies ahead, I got myself to start the payback time.<br />
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Love, your daughter.</div>
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Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-14171244144990511792014-06-28T23:08:00.001+07:002014-06-28T23:16:24.351+07:00Mission's accomplished.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Done having my final thesis defense on June 19th 2014. And this is what it is. 4 years has passed since I got into college. Can't wait to get everything in campus done too. Wish me bunch of luck. And, oh, thank you for the Creator and the creatures. Never been this relieve.</div>
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Let's go grab another mission!</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-1537476161290215462014-06-28T02:30:00.002+07:002014-06-28T02:47:37.266+07:00Oh, hi.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Been such a long time no having chance to take a look at this supposed to be daily writings. Things change, well, they always do: a lot. What do I feel now? Not barely anything. Go along with friends, and stuffs, and all the hard work in my last college year, what else was I supposed to do?</div>
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I got more skeptic to see sort of beautiful things today. After the breakup with my last boyfriend, you know, I'm so over with drama. Like this. You met someone and got the click, you learned to know each other as well, went on dates saying I love you I wanna grow old with you and another similar bullshit thus made you believe everything will stay the same till the end. But then shit happens, like someone came along, just like that, took the happiness you thought it would last (or at least a little bit longer) and there the "I need to talk" goes. The "well, we didn't work out, you know you deserve better," burst out. Cliche. Then what's the point of all?</div>
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So once again I came into conclusion: <b>happiness is sort of an unfinished story</b>.</div>
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There that unfinished story, I guessed it was going to reach the-almost-done part when at less expected, he came again. Not the one who was breaking up with me but the one who was breaking up with me before. Got an exhausting long ride with this one backward, for once I guessed I'm moving on but what happened actually was: I only got another rebound. And by keep coming back to him I got more credits for another, another rebound. Which I know obviously I have to stop.</div>
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And here it is. If only I get the urge to talk to him again, for that I'm sure it wouldn't be necessary to him, I really, really hope, I'm done; we're done. An oldschool stuff never fails me. It won't be aimed to be read, I promise, I just need to write it down to remind if one day, by hearing his voice again, I maybe will turn around and make up my mind. And I don't want that ever to happen. I won't.</div>
</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i><i>Oh, hi. Have you been feeling better?</i></i></div>
<i>
</i>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i><i>I hope you're fine there, elsewhere in town, for which I'm sure you may not think about me anymore like I wish I should. I hope you feeling no regrets too, because by knowing you this far, never once I feel regret about you, about us, and about what have been happening between. I didn't take this as white flag words or even another love letter, not anymore, because what lasts will last and what doesn't, won't. And we don't, we won't.</i></i></div>
<i>
</i></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i><i>You got me so many chances as I always give them to you but we have never worked out, together. Well, where were you? When I set my eyes on the stage looking for yours, when my Dad got his fragile operation for months, when my thesis was defensed and it passed somehow, where were you when I needed you the most? I was alone, I didn't know what I'm doing. Do you think it was easy for me without you? Do you think that there wasn't a goddamn marathon of every second goes by for me without you? Well, I got no clue.</i></i></div>
<i>
</i></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i><i>I won't put the: "I wish I should..." anymore. I had so many times saying goodbye with you but I keep blew them all. You say those harsh words after saying what you feel for me then what did you expect for me to do? That there's the point of every relationship in this world, every good shape of relationship, being there for each other when you're needed. And we're not so into it. And I'm not sorry for that because being your friend for after all this time is not necessary either.</i></i></div>
</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>Somebody needs to show you how to grow up. And what I see now, reflecting those years, God doesn't allow me to be that one, never does. So good luck on your thesis. Take care of your Mom, tell her I'm sorry, don't worry I would tell her by myself anyway because you even never got my regards to her, and treat what's yours better than you did.</i></div>
</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i></i></div>
</blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>I hope you'll understand someday before you'll be the one who really walks away.</i></div>
</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I verily miss the feeling of being in love tho. Is that always this awful?</div>
</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-4850335935082524222014-03-04T20:07:00.002+07:002014-03-04T20:07:32.200+07:00akan ada masanya ketika Dia menutup pintu yang satu,<br />
kita akan segera tahu pintu mana yang tengah dibuka.Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-46122284511922705562014-02-04T02:45:00.002+07:002014-03-04T16:42:45.354+07:00:-)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrlJqsCWppk8L7wTjrtGboFY9_4RBMa0s83FUv2aYBY_MUPTDzLn_pt0QagG6SyQLpIM-fhJB0ru3LDv-krl5KDvTp52i2OwRd5aiyg48EBDofaI497hXQ2ot6WNuCw7_n_4LosJ8AYxwu/s1600/nisabrina.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrlJqsCWppk8L7wTjrtGboFY9_4RBMa0s83FUv2aYBY_MUPTDzLn_pt0QagG6SyQLpIM-fhJB0ru3LDv-krl5KDvTp52i2OwRd5aiyg48EBDofaI497hXQ2ot6WNuCw7_n_4LosJ8AYxwu/s1600/nisabrina.jpg" height="400" width="400" /></a></div>
N: Sab, exhausted.<br />
Sab: What's the matter?<br />
N: Why do good things come to an end, ya?<br />
Sab: <b>So better things can come to begin</b>.Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-62496587852029376052014-01-30T21:55:00.004+07:002014-01-30T21:59:15.730+07:00How many times do people have to suffer heartbreak in a lifetime?<div style="text-align: justify;">
Been awhile not opening this page until it greets me back with memories. Well, the thing is... I've been broken up again. My last relationship that once I thought would last longer than before, didn't work out the way I wish it could be. For several times in my life, I have to suffer heartbreak again.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
But inevitably, I don't know how to feel again right now. How to survive things without mental breakdown caused by the heartbreak, I don't have any idea. I'm so much scared. Getting closer to someone just give you pain in the end. What if they stay? Hey, what if they LEAVE? You'll end up miserable. Alone. You'll wake up nearly every night in a week, it would be 3 or 4, and you can feel a great big hole upon your chest realizing someone has taken something from you which is impossibly to return.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
How could you believe then? Because I learned by the time that a happy ending is sort of an unfinished story. Tho I hope immediately somehow, someday, somebody will come and tell me that whole story.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I just can't fucking wait for that day to come.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-89429953174867201482013-11-15T19:28:00.002+07:002013-11-15T19:32:55.114+07:00A New Chapter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwvwJjNCt1GDKYSXkD7aY5JBsvSGC60h4CnTzMJjqgBm8ce6z0SWNRhwVEL_xW1EMH0ticIpljkIn6lkkJ0BtlZFyRczDvg5uw62RkKnV8sLmzHt_Eeg_qHQd8a7cq8XmnL3j299crHLRI/s1600/Path+2013-11-14+0113.jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwvwJjNCt1GDKYSXkD7aY5JBsvSGC60h4CnTzMJjqgBm8ce6z0SWNRhwVEL_xW1EMH0ticIpljkIn6lkkJ0BtlZFyRczDvg5uw62RkKnV8sLmzHt_Eeg_qHQd8a7cq8XmnL3j299crHLRI/s320/Path+2013-11-14+0113.jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It was riot over there. An emotionally-drained previous relationship. Some hectic internship and thesis days. A couple lonesome cups of coffee and no one to hold but faith in God.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
There he just came along.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I'm VERY MUCH grateful, I hope, He placed this right man on the right time.</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Smooches,</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
N.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-67934355278982325372013-10-03T12:12:00.000+07:002013-10-03T21:19:57.058+07:00A break up never felt this... relieving?<div style="text-align: center;">
<h3 style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: small;"><b style="background-color: white;">Nisa:</b></span></h3>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Good morning buddy, how was your sleep?</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I woke up today and was glad to feel that I've never been this peaceful before. Like there is no more a hole inside my chest anymore, as several days before brought me to.</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">You should feel how amazing it feels too because you know what? You deserve that.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Thank you for the advice, the ears to listen, the arms to drive home (even you're not sobber last night and we stopped at the green light HAHAHA), and the shoulders to carry on this supposed to be hard time (in fact, it's not that hard, thank God).</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I really hope the best for you too! Have a nice day ({})</span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<h3 style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace; font-size: small;"><b style="background-color: white;">Sab:</b></span></h3>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Nisaaaaaaa!!!! This morning I woke up and was happy with my sleep last night, but then I fell asleep for the second time and had a bad dream about him with that girl. Then I felt angry (again).</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I'm VERY MUCH HAPPY to hear that there's no more stones inside your head and heart. You know exactly you deserve it. You know that the only possible step is to stop, move on, and let it go.</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">I know I deserve to be treated good as well... I hope I can collect my power, my frame of mind, and my rigidity to talk to him.</span></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: right;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #999999; font-family: Courier New, Courier, monospace;">Forget men! Let's throw a party! Hahaha you're stronger than you can never imagine ({})</span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: right;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<br /></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisEl0NiB1C9PTkiupdZR7KyJ-3By4Ig5M03fdeyI6c0L_Bm_k8JZ88mrt9qAhVNi5tZinqZ4yw4H15lMKTh0JfT_a1eFY96bPXUZaiA4rhAPtI3nKKDxgYQxheH3kf_OVMV6eF6qaAmU7z/s1600/LINEcamera_share_2013-10-03-20-56-30.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisEl0NiB1C9PTkiupdZR7KyJ-3By4Ig5M03fdeyI6c0L_Bm_k8JZ88mrt9qAhVNi5tZinqZ4yw4H15lMKTh0JfT_a1eFY96bPXUZaiA4rhAPtI3nKKDxgYQxheH3kf_OVMV6eF6qaAmU7z/s400/LINEcamera_share_2013-10-03-20-56-30.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Just had the first conversation this morning with a good friend of mine. Found out that it's funny how could a person has really been everything for you. A friend, a best friend, a brother, a partner in crime, even a partner in every part, a boyfriend, a future husband in plan yet now becomes an ex-boyfriend.<br />
<br />
What else he's gonna try to break? I don't know. I don't want to know either. The last time we talked, I hope so, I said to him I wouldn't like to say sorry, thank you, take care, have fun, or even goodbye like a farewell supposed to be because what done is done. I didn't cry. I didn't beg him to stay. I'm over it. I don't think it's a good idea to make friends again. I already had enough. It's not that I get mad at him, hate him, nor wish it's killing him like it was killing me at the first time, not at all. We both know this is exhausting so the only possible step to do is stop. Move on. Let go. It's neither that I've given up just like that. Things just didn't work out no matter how hard we, or is it only me (I'm not sure) that, try. For have been too long I have fought and done too much for someone, now it's time to fight and do for myself, for the sake of goodness, for both of us.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Let's write again! Next chapter is coming.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-27578740400694320942013-09-27T11:33:00.000+07:002013-10-03T12:23:19.893+07:00Have faith (you'll never know how fragile life is).<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Allah sayang banget sama kamu kok, Nis. You are the most patient person I have ever met. -a bestfriend, one midnight in the end of September</blockquote>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I can't understand what else do I stand for. I still have belief somehow. We'll see where this path would bring me too. It's either God would open this door or He close it tight in order to open a new better one. Things you can't change will eventually change you. Until then, I'd stay. People too much worry about me. In this confusion they make me thankful. I'm fine. I've got everything I need. Though some while it doesn't cross with those I wanted for so long. For after all these years I've been with him all along.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Have faith, people. You'll never know how fragile life is. </div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-78323951118751045002013-09-14T16:57:00.001+07:002013-09-14T17:13:18.628+07:00Reminiscence<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It's true when they say, you don't really know what you've got till it's gone. Either when you gain some, you'll lose some. In my used to be skeptical point of view, I didn't see where the problem is as it's one of phases of life you have to go through. But undeniably, I have to admit too that in fact, our palms are just too small to embrace all the things at the same time, neither do people.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The point I'm going to tell here is, I'm kinda miss some good old days I've had with some good friends that now, I don't find a word which suits best; like when you used to be talking everyday, sharing stories, and other stuffs like hanging around after class, turns out has just became sort of... memories? Not that I'm gone or else but as I break things down it's getting hard, I don't know, even just to ask how life treats them lately. I'm probably the most unreliable person in which when I thought I don't have any importance then I won't be getting involved in those kind of things. But when it comes to those who I respect as, you know, good friends, I'll tend to be sticking around and having none of days go by without stand besides them all along. Thus I'll become the most loyal person on earth. And I'd stay. As long as they want me to but if they don't, I know all by myself where do I stay at.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Are we too busy to grow up?</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br />
ps: have been so long not using this yellow stuff, hoping by the end of the year I'll cut them off with the finished thesis :')</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbdjxD8CukENeYPCDREnS0MhxjqmWYMz_QGl_TufC648cWcRfqXW1XmqLSUy84ZD2dnjNaHVK2aIfuBM7m2IImNrfHKjsabWKQLYD38jNyKpxiZReSYaeALNVAybuKWYf-blJL0MW0DVZJ/s1600/CYMERA_20130914_083759.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbdjxD8CukENeYPCDREnS0MhxjqmWYMz_QGl_TufC648cWcRfqXW1XmqLSUy84ZD2dnjNaHVK2aIfuBM7m2IImNrfHKjsabWKQLYD38jNyKpxiZReSYaeALNVAybuKWYf-blJL0MW0DVZJ/s320/CYMERA_20130914_083759.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-37100341743829589002013-09-08T15:29:00.001+07:002013-09-08T15:33:55.359+07:00Are you?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKBiQlQqa4y6unng9C_tExeukc0qIrTDpo1UTJvnxPYbdW6q12eOO4rirWHMrBD6JQ8erINr9wN1vrF1fOrCaO-9IT0s6WxGtzYouND6lMj-xhPvYYr34TEADNvKCCn-Fc3WkEoYkcalr_/s1600/PhotoGrid_1378473813681.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKBiQlQqa4y6unng9C_tExeukc0qIrTDpo1UTJvnxPYbdW6q12eOO4rirWHMrBD6JQ8erINr9wN1vrF1fOrCaO-9IT0s6WxGtzYouND6lMj-xhPvYYr34TEADNvKCCn-Fc3WkEoYkcalr_/s320/PhotoGrid_1378473813681.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It's just almost 3 months we've been together. And almost 3 years more. Well, not too much to say if I finally said that this is the person behind every cheesy post I wrote in those range times. Go on and laugh. But yes, I'm that peachy. I have everything. Have you ever felt you came into the point of life where you've had more than enough than you could ever ask? Because really I finally figure out that, the truth is nothing. What you believe to be true, is everything.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
He is my best of my best friends. He's often being cranky over me but at the same time he gave butterflies in my tummy. He hates my big cheeks yet his Mom hates him more when he's trying to push me away. He loves his family like so much but I guess I'm starting to love them more than he ever knows. He tends to be unpredictable but I know he thinks mostly with his heart, not with his head that sometimes drives me mad. He's mature enough not to say what he felt right away, but childish enough to let me know that he needs me some more. He's fun. He's the first guy my Dad paying attention to. He's the reason for a better version of me. And lucky me, he's now my dear boyfriend. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Nobody knows what lies ahead so I keep praying that our path were crossed by each other till the end, till only God can do us apart.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-24243435326569997482013-09-08T15:04:00.003+07:002013-09-08T15:07:27.676+07:00Coming back.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Have been so long not to write down my daily stories here. Quite hectic lately, I even haven't had my summer holiday ever since the final week of the last semester has already ended. Many things changed in these five months. About to start my new days ahead, doing the rest of my internship as investigator at one of class action who speaks up about corruption while arranging my thesis in order to finish my study this semester. Sounds heavy, na'ah? Nope, I would try to take this easy by doing things I'd love too. What important in life is it may not always be giving you happiness, yet you should make it balanced to know what it's like to be alive.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I'd like to press rewind for awhile, it was May when I finally came out to know a new family of mine. Abnon Utara, they named it. The young tourism ambassador of north Jakarta which wholeheartedly until now being one of my important things in life. They had my turning back. My ups and downs side and still be with me all along. Even when I had some distance with my used to be close acquaintances, especially in my campus life, the idea of living with no them scary me more. I can see their true colors in which they paint my life herewith.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnvgnQvhKl5IqRnq68flj3ddvtkK7vUoxeYRnnPIMJGUasrQbh0Xkff73fVWe7e74w3NQJ6eSblOv7XRa97lZk8aZvtUDjzbgOZa5JUEXAf91npyj1LqmQqDtOEQJ8NCm939hFw8_xeshX/s1600/1370008439180.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnvgnQvhKl5IqRnq68flj3ddvtkK7vUoxeYRnnPIMJGUasrQbh0Xkff73fVWe7e74w3NQJ6eSblOv7XRa97lZk8aZvtUDjzbgOZa5JUEXAf91npyj1LqmQqDtOEQJ8NCm939hFw8_xeshX/s320/1370008439180.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
And June, and July, passed so fast. I spend my fasting month along my duty in Kuliah Kerja Nyata that my university held. It was some quiet island in West Kalimantan, where the green grass swings and the clear blue sky blend with the wind. We barely had electricity nor phone signal there. A tough life they're having, but I survived. Experiencing my skin burned in clean water crisis didn't take my sight away from the hidden paradise God giving.</div>
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It brought me to August, the coming home and the celebration the joy of Eid Mubarak this year with the beloved ones. I completely realized that it might be me who wasn't thankful enough for so long that He can always take what He lend to us, anytime, anywhere. September is almost through halfway and take me closer to the end of this year. The upgraded-self, haven't I? Uh, I'm bad at time management. Haven't been in Manggarai again to see my kids, yet giving my duty up to my junior already in my basketball squad. Time flies, not just passes. I wish by God it'd stay. Oh and, I miss you, good friends.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-1354380546591014312013-04-19T01:31:00.001+07:002013-04-19T01:39:09.343+07:00What's the point of us?"I could use a friend like you, do the things we shouldn't do..."<br />
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<iframe frameborder="no" height="166" scrolling="no" src="https://w.soundcloud.com/player/?url=http%3A%2F%2Fapi.soundcloud.com%2Ftracks%2F80185917" width="100%"></iframe>
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Coming from a band from Birmingham named Jaws. First time I heard this; hold on and start to listen deep, without any second glance I'm already hooked up. A simple yet intoxicating song. And towards those rhythms there comes a feeling popping up from the bottom of the beats.</div>
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See, we're passing the line, bro. Don't play stabbing like Sid and Nancy or accidentally crashing like Harry and Sally, even being reluctant like Tom and Summer until the season passed. It's all or nothing; we've always convinced yet never had enough. Goddamn it why. Did I make you decent because in return you (always) make me... so happy?</div>
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But either, I don't want you to be the Dexter who loses her Emma, because simply, I don't want to die collided by a bus, before it's too late. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3RCl-mvUQTmMFJwvWByPYFpSXATwHfGCvBfpx8QLnRdaE02xYaZ0GFpEjN1CU2rAoVrG9hjY8F2UBznb3wRfClEFCOzpGEHNHvfh4YQGRDaSO7ZE-DDML9CDmEVYeCG3UKCD7RhaNRAis/s1600/Path+2013-04-19+0018.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3RCl-mvUQTmMFJwvWByPYFpSXATwHfGCvBfpx8QLnRdaE02xYaZ0GFpEjN1CU2rAoVrG9hjY8F2UBznb3wRfClEFCOzpGEHNHvfh4YQGRDaSO7ZE-DDML9CDmEVYeCG3UKCD7RhaNRAis/s320/Path+2013-04-19+0018.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
loves,<br />
your fabulous-cheeks mate.Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-14732769936175132802013-04-13T13:06:00.001+07:002013-04-13T13:06:25.320+07:00<p>But last night he held my hand.. and I felt exactly nothing.</p>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-39496392045341800052013-04-08T02:10:00.001+07:002013-04-08T02:18:01.697+07:00April already.<div style="text-align: justify;">
How's life? Pretty fine, mine is. Just finished my midterm exam and be glad that everything has been back again to where it should be. I'm happy. I really mean it. And for those people who left, told you about them in some previous posts, I know now at least that they're actually going nowhere. They were never supposed to be that close to me, and now, I won't expect to ever be that close again because you know, nobody want to be hurt twice don't they? The crossing boundaries has been blocked by a gate called forgiveness. And forgetful. So then again I guess, I'll carry on. Looking forward to another excitement this life will bring.</div>
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Thus for whom are having sisters like these anyway, who needs armies?</div>
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ps: missing one of us who will celebrate her birthday this month, no other clues! ♥</div>
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Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-34187090697660586742013-04-08T01:53:00.002+07:002013-04-08T02:13:07.196+07:00<div style="text-align: justify;">
Can you imagine what will happen in a year, in 5 years, or even in 10 years from now?</div>
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Can you imagine if we won't be together anymore, won't be making each day of the year, altogether, anymore?</div>
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Can you imagine how scary that will be?</div>
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Because like McCartney said, if you're beside me I know I need never care. </div>
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<br />Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-65111406480103345582013-03-31T11:53:00.002+07:002013-03-31T11:59:21.593+07:00Selepas hujan reda.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Kadang-kadang memang pilihan itu tidak cuma hitam atau putih, suka lupa ada abu-abu juga. Dan pilihan kamu juga untuk menutup bukunya atau menulis cerita lagi di tahun-tahun berikutnya. Kamu tahu sebenarnya apa yang lebih saya takutkan dari kamu lupa sama saya? Saya takut.. suatu hari nanti kamu menemukan orang yang lebih bisa membuat kamu nyaman daripada saya, lalu kamu hilang begitu saja seperti tidak pernah kenal saya.</div>
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Atau mungkin memang harus seperti ini jalannya? Terkadang apa yang benar-benar kita perjuangkan susah sekali jadi kenyataan, dan sebaliknya, apa yang kita biarkan begitu saja malah kejadian. Tapi dari sini saya belajar (lagi), bahwa sebetulnya kita cuma harus percaya (iya, percaya.. memang sulit tapi bukan berarti tidak mungkin), apapun yang Tuhan kasih untuk kita tidak akan terlewat begitu saja, atau bahkan tertukar dengan punya orang lain.</div>
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Mungkin kamu bukan pelangi yang hendak Dia kasih untuk saya. Tapi kamu disini lagi, seperti sebelumnya, selalu lebih dari cukup membuat hujan reda.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-28482211142234059492013-03-28T00:26:00.001+07:002013-03-28T00:34:39.103+07:00Tapi, kenapa?<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Satu.</b></div>
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A: Nisa..?</div>
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N: Hah? (bengong)</div>
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A: Hahaha iya, Nisa!</div>
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N: Eh... Hehe kok..... ketemu lagi? Eh maksudnya, kok disini, kok bisa? Eh...</div>
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A: Hahahahaha, lagi ngapain, Nis?</div>
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N: Lagi hmm hehehe gak ngapa-ngapain.. (masih bengong)</div>
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A: Oh yaudah, duluan ya.. Hati-hati, Nis!</div>
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N: Iya, lo juga ya hehe.. he.</div>
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Ketemu lagi ya, kita.. Rasanya baru kemarin deh main hujan pake seragam sekolah, dan sekarang udah tahun ketiga aja kuliah. Sedih, seneng, kaget, bingung, sampe gak tau lagi mau ngomong apa.. campur aduk semuanya jadi satu. Pernah gak sih randomly lagi keinget sama orang dan tiba-tiba orang itu bener-bener lewat depan mata; brings back all the memories and feelings and.. everything setelah bertahun-tahun you had your own battle with yourself, mati-matian cuma buat menolak untuk ingat. Tapi, kenapa?</div>
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<b>Dua.</b></div>
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D: Terus sekarang gimana, Nis? Udah lebih baik, kan?</div>
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N: Iya, De.. harusnya sih gitu, ya. Tapi somehow gue masih agak sedih.. kenapa, ya?</div>
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D: Mungkin karena lo terpaksa juga sih, Nis.. jadinya berasa serba salah terus sedih deh. Kayak belum bisa nerima tapi ya gimana lagi.. gitu sih menurut gue.</div>
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N: Dea..... dari dulu emang cuma lo yang paling ngerti.. hahaha.</div>
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D: Posisi serba salah itu emang paling gak enak sih, bawaannya pengin lari jauh-jauh aja tapi gak bisa..</div>
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N: Hahahahaha. Iya gitu de. Bener. Banget.....</div>
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Terpaksa, serba salah, sedih, pengin lari.. tapi gak bisa. Kalo boleh jujur, itulah yang bener-bener gue rasain sekarang ini. Pengin banget bikin semuanya kembali seperti semula, atau seenggaknya cukup sampai baik-baik aja.. tapi ternyata gak bisa. Jatuhnya terpaksa.. jadinya begini karena memang jalannya harus begini. Pernah gak sih lo mengalami sesuatu yang sangat amat tidak membuat lo nyaman, tapi lo harus stay disitu sampe entah kapan, mungkin sampe fase hidup yang satu ini selesai.. dan apapun yang lo lakuin untuk memperbaiki keadaan ternyata tanpa bisa lo pungkiri malah makin bikin lo sakit hati. Tapi, kenapa?</div>
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<b>Tiga.</b></div>
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M: Jadi, kamu tetap mau ambil topik ini? Dilanjutin juga buat skripsi?</div>
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N: Hmm.. sejauh ini sepertinya begitu, Prof. Kira-kira kalau saya pake teori yang ini bisa gak, ya?</div>
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M: Jadi agak memaksakan ya.. coba kamu cari teori yang lain, lagi pula saya masih sangsi sama topik kamu.</div>
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N: Hah? Maaf, sangsi gimana maksudnya, Prof?</div>
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M: Begini lho.. topik ini sebenarnya riskan sekali. Selain banyak kendalanya, kamu juga harus pastikan relevansi teorinya benar-benar dapat dipertanggungjawabkan. Kamu tahu, kan, pemerintah juga sudah akan buat kebijakan perihal masalah ini?</div>
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N: Err..... iya, Prof, soal kebijakan itu.. saya jadi ragu apa ini bisa diteruskan atau tidak.</div>
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M: Kamu ragu? Apalagi saya.</div>
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Kalo gue nya aja udah ragu.. apalagi orang lain, kan, ya. Mau itu dosen paling berderet gelarnya satu jurusan atau guru besar sekalipun. I mean, siapa juga yang bisa ngasih arah buat orang yang bahkan gak tau mau kemana? Bahwa pada dasarnya, apapun itu, sesuatu yang selama ini lo anggap benar, akan tetap benar selama lo meyakini bahwa itu benar. Sampai suatu ketika lo menemukan sedikit ketidakyakinan yang dipengaruhi oleh banyak faktor, dan pada akhirnya membawa lo pada ketidaktahuan harus menganggap benar hal yang seperti apa lagi.. kayak semuanya sia-sia aja gitu. Pernah gak sih semua hal yang selama ini lo yakini benar tiba-tiba jadi bullshit dalam sekejap?</div>
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Dan pernah gak sih se-kebetulan itu semua elemen di alam semesta seolah-olah berkonspirasi untuk membiarkan lo jatuh di satu waktu yang bersamaan?<br />
Tapi, kenapa?</div>
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Jadi setakut itu untuk percaya lagi; sama apapun, sama siapapun. Setakut itu.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-74106009482725611762013-03-21T18:50:00.001+07:002013-03-21T18:50:43.843+07:00Wayoloh.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUmp1M5PaJNNbPRC4OpwfQZbzrJ-M4CmTA5hVkSH8j76Hlk5oLnYmWgkqIxN7mAAHVY_O25Lt47TgJW6-Z_M0g0dfvfuRm3bi97u-EmlwDJ0lalDZ6sUAKyajhSalvbKCsSchX-beP-eVo/s1600/tumblr_ln4hr3hTlm1qfisapo1_500_large.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="160" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUmp1M5PaJNNbPRC4OpwfQZbzrJ-M4CmTA5hVkSH8j76Hlk5oLnYmWgkqIxN7mAAHVY_O25Lt47TgJW6-Z_M0g0dfvfuRm3bi97u-EmlwDJ0lalDZ6sUAKyajhSalvbKCsSchX-beP-eVo/s400/tumblr_ln4hr3hTlm1qfisapo1_500_large.gif" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-6520836665410766212013-03-21T00:23:00.001+07:002013-03-21T00:35:42.052+07:00Di Jakarta hujan, di Depok... badai.<div style="text-align: justify;">
Hai, apa kabar?</div>
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Kayaknya baru kemarin ya cerita-cerita disini... tapi sekarang udah pengin cerita lagi. Sedih soalnya :'''( bodo ah mau dibilang labil juga pake acara curhat di blog segala, abisnya the burdens are just too heavy to carry on. And people get tired eventually, listening all the same problems, all over again. Jadi why do I have to tell them either, kan? I guess I just need some space to write this feeling down, sebelum akhirnya (I wish) bisa bener-bener deal with it. Sebelumnya kalo ada yang ngerasa, "Ih kok lo gitu sih, Nis?" atau apapun itulah yang intinya keganggu sama tulisan ini, don't let me know kalo intentionnya cuma buat put the blame on me. I won't feel sorry I tell you from the upfront.</div>
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Hmm... mulainya dari mana yah. Jadi (tarik nafas dulu...) ceritanya gue baru aja sampe rumah. Parkir mobil di garasi terus ngambil barang-barang di jok belakang. When I'm about to slam the door, entah kenapa mata gue tertuju pada 2 goodie bags yang teronggok manis di pojokan. Sempet mikir siapa yang numpang naro tas disitu tapi pasti pada bilang juga kalo mau nitip apa-apa di mobil, dan seinget gue emang gak ada. Sedetik. Dua detik. Hening. Gue bukalah tas itu, ngecek isinya ternyata... ada kaos, legging, dan sepatu lari............. Bener-bener baru ngeh pernah janjian mau lari sore di kampus tapi gak jadi-jadi karena hujan yang kadang-kadang disusul badai. Dan sekarang (tarik nafas lagi...) kayaknya emang gak bakal jadi hehehe. Itu tas punya Dinda sama... Pungky.</div>
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Apa kabar ya dia..... hmm hmm sepertinya terlihat baik-baik saja sih alhamdulillah hehehe. These recent few days (or weeks deh lebih tepatnya), I've been watching her from a distance. Not being able to talk for hours until every midnight di bbm, not being able to buy coffees together nor eat serabi sepulang kuliah, not being able to drive home through the stormy skies from Depok, not being able to..... act like we used to. Kenapa? Hahaha gak tau juga hahahahaha. Bingung. Semuanya kayak cepet banget gitu gue kira kemarin-kemarin gue mimpi..... sampe kebayang-bayang segala ada suara Prof. Adri di kelas yang nyuruh bangun. Ya gitu deh. Ya gitu. Hidup lagi drama banget akhir-akhir ini. Sampe gak bisa bedain mana yang mimpi mana yang beneran (tarik nafas lagi..... panjang).</div>
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People changed just like season. But life goes on. It goes marching on and on. Jadi sepertinya all I can do is... carry on. Toh setiap orang punya jalannya masing-masing kan untuk bahagia (atau seenggaknya untuk merasa, atau bahkan cuma terlihat, baik-baik saja). Kadang in a same way, kadang juga in separated ways. And I'm not a saint yang bisa (dengan sangat mudah) memaafkan dan melupakan. Thus once I forgive, I'll forget everything. I repeat, everything. I have (tons of) insecurity and they happened anyway, tapi gue bisa apa? Pada dasarnya I'm not a type of person yang mudah benci sama orang kok, apalagi sama sahabat sendiri. I mean, ngapain juga ngeributin hal-hal 'sepele' dengan mengorbankan hubungan pertemanan, bahkan persahabatan yang udah bertahun-tahun. Tapi kalo sampe kejadian, nah..... kebayang nggak sakit hatinya udah kayak apa? Terus gimana dong, Pung, jadi kita gak jadi lari sore? Terus gimana ini baju, legging, sama sepatu lo... kapan mau diambil dari mobil gue? :'''( </div>
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Bener deh it takes almost every night to think about. Mungkin gak ada yang tau kalo bahkan it takes the most room in my mind these lately days (hahaha sekarang jadi tau deh kan barusan baca). Wondering how it could be like this, kok jadi gini, ya..... And anytime some random people ask, "She's your best friend, kan, Nis?" atau "Kok udah jarang liat lo bareng-bareng?" atau, "Dia sibuk pacaran ya sekarang hahaha apa jangan-jangan lo udah jadian juga?" I can only smile dan ketawa miris hehehehehe but deep down inside is screaming outloud, "You don't know how it feels to be me so stop asking those stupid questions because everytime I heard her name I feel my hearts break a little deeper." Ya kira-kira gitu deh. Ya udahlah, ya. Udah, udah. :'''''(</div>
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Sekarang..... semangatnya six feet underground banget. Mau ngapa-ngapain bawaannya males, penat. Di kampus rasanya udah setengah-setengah, mau cepet lulus tapi masih banyak yang harus diselesain. Tapi ya tapi, katanya sih, in every loss we always have something left. Tiap lagi kayak gini somehow merasa bersyukur juga akhirnya kalo inget masih punya adik-adik di Manggarai yang setiap minggu selalu nagihin coklat, Momster, Papa-clubber, si pony-hell Sister, Eyangti&Yangkung mentally (and financially) support, Andini, Aidinta, Dinda, dan Icong. Oh, ya, sama Ibnu juga deh (btw kenapa rambutnya beneran jadi kayak Agger sih he is irreplaceable tau!) You guys need to know kalau kalian luv sekali lho :''') dapet salam dari Nisa di Matraman :''''') bete nih Jakarta hujan terus gak berhenti-berhenti, apalagi Depok badainya gak pergi-pergi .... brb escape ke Raja Ampat.</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-53265957758845212252013-03-17T20:45:00.000+07:002013-03-21T00:36:28.884+07:00Hoam.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Sometimes you'll never know the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Tapi sadar gak sih kebanyakan moment bisa bikin memory nya jadi overload?! Gapapa deh cengeng sekali-sekali. Ternyata (sok) kuat terus gak bagus juga buat kesehatan (hati).</div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2216199709561172380.post-44485779966921790272013-03-17T19:32:00.001+07:002013-03-17T20:48:47.444+07:00"Perahu kertasnya udah tenggelam, Kak..."<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX502o9KaX-_0MIF165QDl1ogT1sfDN9ZlD68031hoqagu2T3UU1CsTPDoH9ZofsgORHVlgJ9jdB2YB8xAQhF4DKbQUB6SNYX1HNtIcZIRao8exg83eJGYr8xJ7C2l-7kCgEUApCuvRsV3/s1600/calistungluv.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjX502o9KaX-_0MIF165QDl1ogT1sfDN9ZlD68031hoqagu2T3UU1CsTPDoH9ZofsgORHVlgJ9jdB2YB8xAQhF4DKbQUB6SNYX1HNtIcZIRao8exg83eJGYr8xJ7C2l-7kCgEUApCuvRsV3/s320/calistungluv.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Echa: "Kaniiiiisss, aku bikinin pesawat kertas nih buat Kakak!"</div>
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Nisa: "Wah bagus sekali, terima kasih ya. Kalau perahu kertas ada ngga, Cha?"</div>
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Echa: "Yah, perahu kertasnya udah tenggelam, Kak..." (sad face)</div>
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Nisa: "....." (speechless)</div>
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Selalu ada cerita di setiap minggu sore. It's when their smiles turn into your happiness, and their "Kak, minggu depan kita belajar lagi, ya!" become one of your survival reasons. Biar aja perahu kertasnya udah tenggelam, aku masih punya pesawat kertas kok! Hihihi lucky me <span style="background-color: whitesmoke; color: #333333; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left; white-space: pre-wrap;">♥</span><!--3--></div>
Nisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16459454178368055821noreply@blogger.com